Tuesday, June 10, 2008

Why GTA IV isn't all that

So today, I'm catching up on some of the other achievements and working on other random things. I decide I'm going to work on the swimming part of the Liberty City Marathon (of course if they knew what they were doing, they'd have called it a decathlon - ten events - but whatever), 40 miles. I've got 1 done, so I've got a ways to go.

I swim for a bit, climb into a boat and drive, jump back in and swim, walk on the shore, and so on. At one point, I look up and notice that I'm taking damage ... from ... uh, I don't know. Fatigue, I guess?

So I panic and swim madly for sure, but of course action fatigue sets in and so Niko can only swim at slow speed for a while. (I guess that experience in the war didn't really help any.) Finally, I crawl onto land just before I die.

As I'm making my way back to civilization, Packie calls me. Sure, I'll play pool. So I head toward a street where I can catch a cab.

I pass a hot dog stand. Hmm, I'm almost dead, I could use one. And here is where some of GTA's many flaws converge:

  • There's someone standing on the hot spot, so I can't buy a hot dog; worse yet, I start circling him, moving back and forth to try to find out how to get where he is.
  • Naturally, he takes exception to me, but I don't want to start anything because I don't have a car or life. He takes a swing and takes the last of my health.
  • I wake up outside the hospital, without my untouched life vest (I guess even though they can resurrect you with all your weapons, they take your body armor). However, now Packie no longer appears on the map.
  • I don't come pick him up (because I don't know where he is), so of course he texts me and is mad.


Rockstar, you're playing with fire. GTA has a fairly committed fan base, but honestly, there are problems with GTA IV. A lot of them. You need to address some of them before GTA V comes out, or you're going to end up like EA (I know, from an economic sense that would be great), with some casual fans who like the games and hardcore enemies who hate how solid franchises were slowly brought down to earth.

At the very least, next time, give me an option to tell my friend "Sure, I'll play pool, but I'm dying on the beach right now. How about two hours?"


  1. Wait - at first I thought you were angry because you couldn't eat the hot dog....but it's actually because you couldn't put off playing pool?

    I is confused.

  2. I was angry because it wasn't smart enough to realize that there was someone standing where I needed to be to buy the hot dog, and in the process, it started a fight with that someone, and that person landed a punch before I realized what was happening, and that punch was enough to kill me because it wouldn't let me buy the hot dog in the first place.

    Of course, in retrospect, you might actually get killed in New York for cutting in front of someone at a hot dog stand.


There was an error in this gadget